Being married to an entrepreneur takes talent, strength and courage. I’ve learned a ton during our 14 year journey together. I’m still learning and I know the journey isn’t over, but over the past 14 years I’ve become a pretty savvy entrepreneurs wife. Ha!
Choose the magic. Being married to a big dreamer is infectious. A lot of times my husband just needed a partner to dream with. It is an amazing feeling when the things you dreamed about together so many years ago start to come to fruition. Thinking big seems cliche, but when you are married to an entrepreneur you have to bust through all glass ceilings. Big actions come from big thoughts.
Stand outside of the box:
Standing outside of the box is for sure one of the number one things I’ve learned. I’ve had to find a new kind of normal. A normal that we created together, “our normal”.
Being optimistic seems simple, but when everything is stormy and your pessimistic side wants to kick in, you have to strive to stay positive. Optimistic mindset is key.
Change is okay:
In entrepreneurship your situation changes daily. There are the highs of high and the lows of low. You must learn that this too shall pass. You also have to learn yesterday’s successes are in the past, today is a new day. Nothing stays the same and finding the security in this can be challenging.
Finding a new form of security:
Like I mentioned in the above comment, nothing stays the same. I had to find my footing on shifting sand and be okay with it. Security is a strong desire for a lot of women. When you’re married to an entrepreneur you must find a new kind of security. The steady paycheck doesn’t exist a lot of times and especially in the beginning. With the lack of income and investments that need to happen it can leave you grasping for anything that remotely feels like safety. I had to learn to stay strong, trust my husband and know that together we are unstoppable. Even when we were broke!
I learned that I needed to be involved in some way. This has varied for us over the years, but one thing I have learned is not being involved can create division and is not healthy for the entrepreneurial family. I’m not saying you have to start taking action in the daily activities of the business, but find how much involvement and interaction works for you and your spouse. Start there.
Lead from the back:
I learned that I played a key role in the success of our family. I had to be encourager and the cheerleader, sounding board, and confidant to my husband. I had to believe in him when he wanted to stop believing. Being behind the scene and wearing so many hats as a mother, wife, and business partner makes you outstanding. I learned that I’m leading even if I’m not in front of the pack, because if I stop moving the ship can start taking on water.
Be gracious with the bad decisions:
When you’re married to an entrepreneur there are some failed attempts at success. I had to learn to bite my tongue and be gracious in those times. It is hard to invest your life into building a legacy for your family. When you fall short at times the last thing you need is the person that is suppose to believe in you to say, “see I told you this was a bad idea.”
We are a team:
It’s us against the world, if this ship goes down we go down together. I had to learn that we are not against each other, our differences make us unique. We had to find the balance between what he needs and what I need and communicate in a way that we are both heard. At times it has felt like we were fighting against each other but we had to learn that together we are stronger and together we are better. Being an entrepreneur is hard enough, with all the criticism and self doubt. The battle is out in the world not in our home.
Life is a balancing act:
There is a lot that goes on in our daily life. I had to learn at times that this does not always mean equal involvement. I’ve had to be okay with taking on more of our family life at times when my husband was in a launch, working on a big project, or during the times he just needed the space to create. Learning to be okay with the lack of equality is key sometimes.
Learn to swim:
The water is deep and at times the waves are high. I had to learn to be an Olympic swimmer. But when I finally reached dry land I found myself to be stronger than ever.
Remember to keep treading water, land is just out of site.